As Maiku (Minion extraordinaire – friend him immediately) pointed out, I haven’t blogged in FOREVER. Why? Because, my Minions, Auntie Heather has been dealing with a lot of crap…and when she hasn’t been dealing with all the crap, she’s been in her Happy Place.

My Happy Place is that moment when I’m so involved in the story that I’m writing that I am completely, blissfully unaware that I am Heather Brewer, Author Person. I am only the character that I’m writing about. I’m living their life, facing their challenges, not my own. And no matter how much their life sucks, it’s always much more fun to face than my own challenges.

Sometimes I’m Vlad, facing down bullies and slurping down blood bags. But not always. And lately, I’ve been someone completely different. And I really dig this character, this situation. So I get lost leading other (imaginary) people’s lives, and forget for a moment that I have one of my own.

But no worries, Minions…I always come back. = And soon…there will be new website changes and an all new message board on heatherbrewer.com, where my Minions can hang.

How’s the Minion Horde anyway?

Okay, a fabulous minion has created a place where you can all bond and chat, talk about the books, and all sorts of stuff. And I am totally joining. Who’s with me?? It’s HERE.

I found this quiz, obviously created by a Minion. But I only scored a 90.

Dude. I don’t even know my own books!

(To be fair, a couple of the questions could go either way on a few answers)

Anyhoo, I thought you might enjoy it, my Minion Horde.

EDITED TO ADD: Oh hey, I forgot! Congrats to Feresha and Zyn!!!

Okay, Minions, so I’m almost finished with BREAKING DAWN…and I will be amazed if I can choke down these last 100 pages. So many things have irritated me about this book that I don’t even know where to begin. Such as:

1. Why is Jacob the only character who seems to be acting the way he did in previous books? The rest feel like strangers to me. I MISS them!

2. So Bella gets her wedding, A LOT of sex (both pre-vampire and post-vampire), Jacob as her friend (how helpful that those pesky romantic feelings just up and died when she did), Charlie, immortality, and a baby??

3. I am so SICK of everyone gazing in wonder at how perfect Bella is now. Everything comes way to easy to her, she’s the most beautiful, etc. Ugh. Pass the bucket. I’m gonna be ill.

4. Where’s the conflict?? It seems that every time an interesting problem arises, it’s corrected quickly and painlessly.

5. I don’t feel like I’m reading a book. I feel like I’m reading a diary.

Those are a few of my reactions. I keep waiting for the Volturi to swoop in and mangle someone important, just to shake things up. *sigh* What did you guys think?

CAUTION: If you have not read EIGHTH GRADE BITES and NINTH GRADE SLAYS, be forewarned that the following copy may reveal spoilers.

High school can be so draining when you’re half-human, half-vampire

It’s another sucky year at Bathory High for Vladimir Tod. The evil vampire D’Ablo is hunting for the ritual that could steal Vlad’s powers. His best friend Henry doesn’t want to be his drudge anymore. And as if all that weren’t enough, it’s getting harder for Vlad to resist feeding on the people around him. When months go by with no word from Uncle Otis and D’Ablo shows up demanding Vlad’s father’s journal, Vlad realizes that having a normal high school year is the least of his concerns. Vlad needs to act fast, and even his status as the Pravus won’t save him this time…

EIGHTH GRADE BITES is a word search!!! It just doesn’t get any better than that.

And, as if that wasn’t cool enough, I’m happy to share that both EIGHTH GRADE BITES and NINTH GRADE SLAYS are going to be audiobooks!! They’ll soon be available through Audible.com. I spoke to the voice actor who will be reading the books, and wow…he has a great voice. I think he’ll do a fangtastic job.

Okay, Minions, Auntie Heather is off to New York for a few days (I’ll be back on the 10th) for the Backspace Conference. Technically, I don’t leave until the 6th, but I have all sorts of stuff to do first, so I likely won’t be blogging much before then.

But after that (and well, Dragon*Con) I promise things will get back to normal around here…what passes for “normal” here, anyway. =

To all of you who came out and partied with me at the BREAKING DAWN event in Fairview Heights, IL, FANGS A LOT! I had an amazing time, and I hope that you did too. =