Dear Vlad,

I’m Rayne McDonald, member of the Blood Coven Vampires. I hope you don’t mind me writing you out of the blue like this, but I read about your troubles with Elysia and thought you might be open to hearing about a different kind of vampire organization. One that won’t try to kill you or put on you trial or any of that crap.

The Blood Coven resides in an old New England graveyard, deep underground. Its Master, Lord Magnus, was actually once a knight in shining armor for King Arthur himself. (Crazy, I know!) In any case, he was turned into a vampire during the crusades and just recently took over as Master after his sire, Lucifent, was killed by Bertha the Vampire Slayer. (He’s also dating my sister, Sunny.)

I know, I know, you’re like, why would I join a vampire coven who can’t even protect its master from being staked? Well, let me assure you, Vlad, that this was a very special case. Lucifent was a child vampire and Slayer Inc doesn’t really approve of those. But hey – as you’re already going into the 11th grade that’s nothing you’d ever have to worry about.

Besides, Bertha’s back only part time and I’m the main slayer now.

Okay, I can tell, I’ve lost you again. After all your troubles with Joss last year, I’m sure you’re not totally keen on making the acquaintance of any slayers. But, believe me, it’s not like I wanted this gig to begin with. Turns out, once a generation is born a slayer, just like on Buffy, and this time it happened to be yours truly. Nothing I can do about it–believe me I’ve tried.

But here’s the deal: I only dust the Big Bads. As a member of the Blood Coven, you’d be totally safe. And by the way, how about cutting Joss some slack while you’re at it? After all, he was only following orders…

Speaking of Big Bads, what’s the deal with you letting D’Ablo just go like that? I mean, dude, I know you want to be all humanitarian and stuff, but come on! The guy’s proven himself to be uber evil! As evil as the Vampire Maverick, who I was commissioned to slay last year after he tried to introduce a blood virus that would destroy the coven! Do you think I had any second thoughts before diving that stake into his heart? No freaking way.

So here’s what I’m thinking. You join the Blood Coven and instantly get protection from all the Elesian vamps wishing to do you harm. And as a bonus, me and Joss can team up to slay D’Ablo for you once and for all.

Let me know what you think!

Love,
Rayne McDonald
Vampire/Vampire Slayer
The Blood Coven
www.bloodcovenvampires.com

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