I’ve never had an unrealistic view about what an author’s life must be like. I always knew it would require hard work, late nights, and inconvenient travel. I also knew it would mean inspiring someone – even one person – to read (if I’d done my job, that is), and getting to spend my happily introverted days in front of a computer. I thought I had a pretty good idea of what it was like to be a successful author.
Now…I think I was kinda wrong. Or at least a lil confused about what it really would mean.
So if you’re considering becoming an author, there are a few things that no one will tell you. That is, except for your Auntie Heather.
1. You will have a zillion deadlines, and they will all come at the SAME TIME.
Seriously. I have two books due on August 1st, and while I trust my publisher completely, the little voice in my head is questioning their sanity. “TWO BOOKS?! BOTH due the SAME DAY?!”, the little voice cries. I generally ignore it, or squash it with a tack hammer. It happens. Terrible, tight, grueling deadlines happen – and you have every right to complain! But not too much. After all, tight deadlines mean you have books contracted, which is a good thing if you want to continue publishing.
2. You will have no friends. At least, not any who you can see/talk to/spend time with. Unless you’re attending the same conventions.
Okay, that might be a bit dramatic, but I honestly cannot figure out how other authors are managing to spend time hanging out and shopping with friends in person, when I can barely find time to return emails to my friends that live in the magic box on my desk (ie, my computer). I’m both jealous and simply amazed.
3. When you go on tour, you’ll travel to incredible cities THAT YOU WILL NOT SEE.
Unless you peer out the window of your escort’s car, you won’t even get a glimpse of some pretty amazing cities, because touring, while awesome, is about reaching fans (in my case, Minions!) and selling books.
4. You will never feel like you know anything about the business….until you do.
And odds are, when you finally realize there’s an aspect of publishing you feel pretty smart about, someone else will feel smarter about it and you’ll feel dumb again. Don’t try to understand publishing…just love it.
5. In the end, the book is all that matters. But you won’t have time to write it.
My schedule is gruelling – on the Appearance page, you guys only see stuff you could attend. I don’t list things like school visits and business or personal travel that doesn’t involve appearances. Heck, in May/June 2010 alone, I’m gone on 4 trips, all within a three week period. The travel is exhausting, but the deadlines loom. And everything must wait for The Book. Family, friends, colleagues, showering – The Book comes first.
6. It’s worth it.
Every moment of stress, every trek through the busy airport, every Skype with family from across the country. It’s all worth it. And like anything else that’s worth it, it’s not easy.
My life isn’t glamorous. But it’s mine. And I wouldn’t trade with anybody else. I guess all I really would like to make it complete would be time….and world domination, of course.
Tags: author life
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I had this dream… about this boy.. and he visits a town with his family.. and there this vampire kidnaps him.. but he’s deformed.. and there’s an entire clan of them called the reds. And they are outcast vampires and the real vampires are coming to kill the kid’s family and they have to stop him. and the reds have all these cool powers. Like it?
Did I replied
That was for FLoC
SHMEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love ye Auntie Heather! You are such an inspiration! You have inspired me to become an author. I have total writing skillage, and ye have inspired me to get my work out there! All of you fellow Minion Horders, be on the look out! I’ll mention ye in the back where the author writes abunch of stuff about awesome people who they like and who have helped them and such… that would be you guys!!!!!
I love ye all… well most of ye anyway!
LOVE,
YOUR FAT LARD OF CHEESE
Right on, FLoC!
I too, intend to become an author. Infact, I’m just about done with my book I’m writing. Those publishers are going to make lots of money with the potential that some of these bloggers hold. But I’d still much rather be a best selling author than a money rich publisher. Not exactly sure what to do after I finish and polish my book though.
Oh yeah, I learned a lot from a website I go on to roleplay. It extends your expanding vocabulary and makes you very discriptive.
Anyway, the Vlad books pwn…butt. I love you Vlad, and I love you Auntie Heather!!!! You definately inspired me as well
wow FLoC! you are hyper today!!! PS I see you I am looking at you! how you may ask. we go to the same school, same class, squeek! Who did that? IDK
hate you #5
aka expression
Expressions can we be friends???
@ nonexistant my buddy (Killer Dragon’s buddy) says hi. she’s also the one with the “problem” (you know who)! we are so flipping angry. ( i would cuss but me not in the mood) RAWR! I am famous in class for my deafining growl! PS i growl @ people!
love the V.T.M. reference Malcavians rule
goth clubs rock if you find the right one Skybar here in b.g. Ohio is the best in the region with about 300 frequent offenders every Wednesday for I.Nation the hardest and heaviest night of the week
sounds like a ton of work but it sounds so fun 2 travel like that
You are dead on about it all. So much stress and work for anyone and especially if you have other things that are priorty like children or school or just wanting a life. But you’re definately right, in the end it is without a doubt worth the stress, blood and stress
Its almost so hard to say stuff on Auntie Heathers new blog is it me or has she gained like 40000 more minions!!!! Its almost hard to be posted on there for more than like 5 mins
Thanks for this article, I want to be an author and it ROCKS that you wrote this post, THANK YOU!!
Aunite Heather,
I’m writing a book called Murder by Midnight. it’s about a girl named Holly and her sister was killed by a vampire at midnight!!!! I got 3 chapters already. got any advice for me?
Love,
N.U.
HOLY CRAP i wanna be an author SOOOOOO FREAKIN’ BAD. I have tones of stories, none that don’t end with sacrifice or blood or something painful. I’m only 12 but I swear on my Moms grave (She’s not dead but who cares!!) that i will be a freakin’ author. There are probaly two kids in my school who want the same thing so I will be one!!!! I am not ganna be a doctor MOM!!!!!!
You’ve definately inspired me:D
THANK YOU AUNTIE HEATHER I AM WRITING 3 BOOKS RIGHT NOW AND AM EXITED!!!!!!!!!
And all of what you said is exactly why I’m going to be an author, no matter what the cost is.
you inspire me, Auntie Heather.
AJ darling, i hope to be seeing you there sometime xD
as for the blog itself, i only read it because my sister wants to be an author. i am currently forcing her to read the series >=D she says its helping and im about to turn her into a full-blown minion.
ta for now loves. bite hard, rock harder
ps: world domination in the name of Auntie Heather!
My hands were filled with tools and needles; my mind was occupied. I was in my element. Here I created my greatest of works. But fluttering beneath my calm exterior was a twinge of terror. It was small, but present none the less, because I had made a mistake. Little did I know it then, but we were ruined.
vampyriclover123 is now vampyrelover123…x.x
Ha Ha even after i read this my desire to be a writer increased
Hey very nice blog!! Man .. Beautiful .. Wonderful .. I will bookmark your blog and take the feeds also…
my friend finish the whole vlad books!!!
so proud of her!!!
but she wont let me borow the last book!!!
uggh!!!how much is the bok???
all i have is 20$!!!
Thanks for this, Auntie Heather.
I really am deeply considering writing and this really helped me. I really have been searching the web, looking for experienced writer’s advice to not-so-experienced writers.. and your advice truly helps.
I knew that there was a deadline, but I never knew it was that demanding! Wow.
And thanks for the nice information on becoming a shut-in and not being able to hang out all the time. It was a bit dramatic, sure, but I know exactly where you are coming from.
But the best piece of all was definitely the piece about it all being worth it. It may seem like a tough job but I’m sure you enjoy writing your amazing novels just for your Minions
Sincerely,
The FANGED one who is FABULOUS.
Thanks 4 the tips. I wanna be an author when I grow up. Also, know that im on ur side always. I heart Vlad.
Like pretty much everyone else that replied to this post, i wish to be an author as well. and just as good as you Auntie Heather
I have wrote several stories but none as good as any other author 
But ur advice has me thinkin that i should go back over them and rewrite. thanks sooo much Auntie Heather!!!!!!! Love you and the fabulous Vlad Tod 
i love the vlad tod series SO MUCH!! i got the books, and I read each of them in one day, i loved them so much!! Without you, i wouldn’t have this completley other world to escape into. I’m sad that the 5th book will be the last.. but it is so great to have such an amazing and unique author like you! Thanks for your hard work, it seriously paid off! They should definatly make these books into movies, it would be AMAZING! I would be first in line to buy the tickets…. or even audition! It was always a dream of mine to be in a movie like this story.
Anyway, you are an incredible author and I am so grateful that you took the time to create such a unique world that readers can dive into, and forget reality for a while. (even though the Vlad Tod series HAS become a reality to me…) Thanks again.
OHMIGOSHILOVETHEVLADTODSERIESSOMUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have inspired me to write my own book i just am tryna get it published, its about a teenage half human half vampire that has to choose between his vampire side- and his life and needs for nourishment- and his human side, when his Hunger comes in. His girlfriend and best friend all want him to drink blood but he swears that he will never drink from a human in his life causing the Transylvanian council to get mad. Now theyre coming to destroy all the humans in his small town. He has to use all his skills and his special Immortal One powers to survive his senior year alone. And with a slayer in town and his vampire mother missing, he has to do it all alone. Sound good
?
OHMIGOSHILOVETHEVLADTODSERIESSOMUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have inspired me to write my own book i just am tryna get it published, nd i m so sad 2find out the fifth book is the last
, nd IWANTAMOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why hasnt summit or somebody called you about a movie?????? GIMME A VLAD MOVIE!!! Whats wrong with you directors and producers?????? O you can make a twilight movie but you cant make a vlad tod movie??????? this is outrageous lol
Writeing about things is one thing i like about! I might just have to be careful to write my books for if i ever want…while reading your books and once i put it down i go on my computer and start typing my story that i am writing yet i know i have more to come.
The Hunger
Chapter 1- Hidden
The vampire neatly folded his tie and stepped out into the night, hos throat burning with thirst. He searched the dirty streets of the shoddy city of Manhattan for a juicy one, but most of them were either homeless, way too noble for his tastes, or were just really obese and had too many blood clots. Then finally he found a skinny, shy 12 year old girl that’s scent was floral somehow. He followed her until she reached 12th Street, then kidnapped her and tackled her down. S
SORRY GUYS HERES THE FULL CHAPTER
The Hunger
Chapter 1- Hidden
The vampire neatly folded his tie and stepped out into the night, his throat burning with Thirst. He searched the shoddy city of Manhattan for a good, juicy one, but they were either homeless, way too noble for his tastes, or morbally obese and had too many blood clots. Then finally he found a skinny, shy 12 year old girl that’s scent was floral somehow. He followed her around until she reached 12th street, then tackled her down and sucked her dry. She did scream, but no one could hear her, as her puny screams were too soft and slow for his vampiric speed and strength. Once he was full, he searched until he finally found Brockwood. Looking into 1802 Snow Lane, he saw the child.
The child stared back at him.
Time slowed to a crawl.
The boy’s eyes filled with fear. He stepped away from the window.
This was the half human, half vampire child he’d been sent to kill.
He’d tried several times in the past, but it had never worked. The Transylvanian council had told him: “This time, you will not fail,” right before they’d lobotomized him. He’d come out vicious. He wouldn’t stop until he caught this boy. The child of the ludicrous prophecy, the prophecy of the Immortal One. The Immortal One supposedly would stay alive forever and protect the universe from turmoil but he would also enslave vampirekind. And the vampire couldn’t let that happen.
He would terminate this bafoon child, and walk away without a backward glance.
HOPE U ENJOYED IT…
this is my book
Change
1
As I ran into the dark, humid night I knew that my memories from this place would fade, but I was happy. All the things they injected in me, it all hurt so baddy. Tears grazed my face. Finally, to be out of this hell on earth and forget all about it.
But it would be a short lived victory if they captured me again. For the first time the night sky did not comfort me, as I the sick twisted monsters that kept me as a lab rat followed me into the thick forest. I heard the bullets grazed past me. I took the bomb out of my backpack, threw it back and hid behind a thick oak tree. It exploded and I heard screams. It felt good hurting them. The bomb had C4 explosives and rusted nails. That should give me time to climb up the tree, or so I thought. The bullets continued to slice the air around me. Than a bullet hit me smack in my left arm.
Want to know the worst thing about having a quick reaction time? You register pain faster. I let out yell from the pain but there was no time to cry. I cradled my injured arm with my good one than decided to keep running. I was sure no nine-year-old had been through that.
Than joy filled my heart. A road, but not just any road, a road with a car on it! So I got out a big metal rod I found and smashed the car window. I hopped in, got out my knife and started to hotwire the car when another bullet hit me in the same arm. I bit my lip but continued. I wasn’t sure if this was going to work, I only hoped. Than, to my amazement, the car roared to life. I hit the gas so hard that I had started to smell burnt rubber as the gage went to 80. I looked back and saw only white coats shaking fists at me. I giggled than turned back to the road. I’m going to loose my memory soon I remembered so I took off my chocker wrote a quick note, than put both in my right pocket.
please leave comments
@Mickey i loved it
thnx 4 the tips, auntie heather i have been inspired to write my own book. this info will help me alot.
i love your books i think youre a good writer
Great Post, thanks for your useful Post. I will come back later * Great tips also : stop biting nails
Un blog interesante, me ha gustado mucho. Agur
Un blog interesante, te hace pensar. Agur
So your all going to be authors now right? Right, your just lying your asses out.
We’re going to have tons of authors, and everyone is going to publish, their own books. Idiots, your all fucking lying. Your not being inspired your trying to get this stupid Author’s attention. Like I am going to believe the majority of the comments here will make their books, and become a author. Like shit you will.
Heather Brewer, your books are good, though I hate you for ending 12th grade kills like that. It might stress you, but still satisfy the damn readers and fucking make a good book, with a damn Epilogue, of some sort.
Chapter 2- The Hunger
I stared at the massive pile of homework on my desk.
You would think that the old crackhead would give me some slack for being an ADHD kid. But noooooooo. I was still hazardous to his health, and when I refused his notion, he vehemently silenced me.
Plus, it was, like, FREEZING outside, so I would be a Jadensicle.
Great.
I grabbed my binder and headed into the cold snow. As I barreled down the steps, she looked at me.
I was breathless.
Veronica Klein was like a super-duper-dupermodel, if they even existed. She had long brown hair and warm golden eyes that should not have mixed, but did. She always wore clothing that showed me a hint of something that made my toes curl. Veronica would never go out with me. But I hoped against hope she would. I sighed and headed to my bus, unknowing of what was to come.
…
When I got home, my dad was not there.
Of course he wasn’t. My dad was Lawrence Fisher, the great buff actor. He was the one all the girls fell for. He was SOOO concieted. He actually bought one of the dolls that had been made for him. Oh, and not to mention he, like, hated my guts? So much for fishing trips.
Maybe fishing for designer jeans and 1,000 dollar toothbrushes.
I rolled my eyes at no one in particular angrily. How DARE he pass on his meeting with his vampiric son?
As I walked into my room, I saw someone sitting in my bed, and I gasped. It was a girl and a boy. The boy had light brown hair and light eyes, and the girl was cute.
“My name is Snow,” the girl whispered softly.
“What are you doing in my house?” I roared, contemplating violence if she resisted to tell me the truth.
“I’m Henry, Vladimir Tod’s drudge,” said the boy.
The name stung me with a hint of betrayal. I knew the Pravus. I’d known Dorian, too. He was my uncle.
“The Pravus?” I said with disbelief.
“A prophecy even more dangerous than his is stirring,” Snow muttered, and her eyes flashed iridescent green. I
Chapter 2- The Hunger
I stared at the massive pile of homework on my desk.
You would think that the old crackhead would give me some slack for being an ADHD kid. But noooooooo. I was still hazardous to his health, and when I refused his notion, he vehemently silenced me.
Plus, it was, like, FREEZING outside, so I would be a Jadensicle.
Great.
I grabbed my binder and headed into the cold snow. As I barreled down the steps, she looked at me.
I was breathless.
Veronica Klein was like a super-duper-dupermodel, if they even existed. She had long brown hair and warm golden eyes that should not have mixed, but did. She always wore clothing that showed me a hint of something that made my toes curl. Veronica would never go out with me. But I hoped against hope she would. I sighed and headed to my bus, unknowing of what was to come.
…
When I got home, my dad was not there.
Of course he wasn’t. My dad was Lawrence Fisher, the great buff actor. He was the one all the girls fell for. He was SOOO concieted. He actually bought one of the dolls that had been made for him. Oh, and not to mention he, like, hated my guts? So much for fishing trips.
Maybe fishing for designer jeans and 1,000 dollar toothbrushes.
I rolled my eyes at no one in particular angrily. How DARE he pass on his meeting with his vampiric son?
As I walked into my room, I saw someone sitting in my bed, and I gasped. It was a girl and a boy. The boy had light brown hair and light eyes, and the girl was cute.
“My name is Snow,” the girl whispered softly.
“What are you doing in my house?” I roared, contemplating violence if she resisted to tell me the truth.
“I’m Henry, Vladimir Tod’s drudge,” said the boy.
The name stung me with a hint of betrayal. I knew the Pravus. I’d known Dorian, too. He was my uncle.
“The Pravus?” I said with disbelief.
“A prophecy even more dangerous than his is stirring,” Snow muttered, and her eyes flashed iridescent green. I gasped.
“Vladimir-”
“Vlad,” Henry corrected.
“Vlad’s eyes do that, don’t they?”
Henry nodded uneasily. “He’s been sending me dreams, visions… messages.”
“My boyfriend is missing,” Snow whispered.
The Pravus was gone.
I was in shock.
The story is set six years after chapter 1. Jaden is eighteen, and a new prophecy bigger than Vlad’s is stirring. Read the Chronicles of the Immortal One trilogy!
@Mickey I like it. Its cool. Keep writting. I’m writting a book about medievil times with swords and archers. I don’t know the plot of it yet, I haven’t gotten past the first few setences. I’m also writting another one about a goth girl named Zaz, u font know the plot for that either tho. I don’t think of plots just the main charactors. Ideas? O the first scene in the medievil one is an epic battle! I like battles and blood and gore….
@Mickey I like it. Its cool. Keep writting. I’m writting a book about medievil times with swords and archers. I don’t know the plot of it yet, I haven’t gotten past the first few setences. I’m also writting another one about a goth girl named Zaz, i dont know the plot for that either tho. I don’t think of plots just the main charactors. Ideas? O the first scene in the medievil one is an epic battle! I like battles and blood and gore….